As many of you know another year has gone behind me. I'm twenty two now. I suppose I've come a long way. I don't piss all
over the place nearly as much as I did twenty two years ago, that's a plus. And I've bulked up a lot, what with the ability
to walk and all. I've already affirmed many of my life long dreams- became a chef, wrote a novel, made people laugh, gathered
together a group of friends and plotted world domination, ate at some of the finest restaurants in the country, became an
artist. Here's a few highlights:
1987? - I got a fucking awesome transformers action figure from my mom. Also got to check out the transformers
movie. Fuck yes, life was good!
1988: My wealthy grandparents took me to the polls to vote with them. I remember that I wanted to vote for Reagan. Possibly
because the word "Republican" sounds like something you could eat, while "Democrat" sounds like something that had to go in
the toilet. It might also have had to do with the fact that my grandparents probably benefited a lot from Reagans vile policies.
1994: I recall Kurt Cobain's death having very little impact on me, though now I'd kick my eleven year old ass for not
having gotten to see him.
1997: So many cool events. My friends and I smoked pot and got drunk for the first time. I found out that my father smoked
pot for the first time. I conducted various illegal activities. I also got to play FF7, best video game ever.
2001: I organized my first protest and political group.
2005: My art began to sell well and I ascended to the rank of chef at the restaurant where I work. Also, a little site
called Jelly Pufflemur came into being, largely by my own design.
But there's still a lot I need to do before I die of a drug overdose or a FBI bullet overdose at the age of 27. Twenty
seven, by the way, is the age when anyone who's anyone aught to die. Thirty is lame anyhow, and after that it's all pretty
much downhill. I'm sure there's a lot of this nonsense on the internet, but I'm a lot more interesting than the rest of the
internet. So, here's my list of things to do this year.
Get books published. - I'm hoping this one will happen soonest.
Write at least one book containing all new material. - I'm very slowly starting on this, but I can't say anything yet.
Dine at Cilantro Bistro and Irish Isle more often. - I've been meaning to look into some good restaurants to find more
inspiration.
Get a copy of more of Ginsburg's poems for my wallet - I carry around a handwritten version of Howl in my wallet just incase
I ever need it. I want to transcribe America as well.
Get a domain name and adless hosting for the site. - I'm hoping to get this done with soon but I'm not sure I'll be able
to make back all the money it's going to cost me.
Go to a protest - I havn't been to one this year so far, so I have to make it to the 24th since it's kinda an annual tradition.
Not sure how I'll get there though.
Visit the mediterannean - This is more of a long time goal, but I really do want to check out that great area of the world.
Especially Spain and the Riviera.
Quit job - It's not that I don't like the people at my job, most of them anyways, just its horribly stressful and, as Marx
teaches us, "all wage labor decays the soul" I really want to just get published, even if I'll be making less money then.
Start a proper drinking habit - I really do need to find a good liquer I can drink at least once a day.
And, on the same vein, I need to at the very least try LSD and Shrooms - Come on, it's just a necessity.
There's some other more serious ones I won't get into at present, but for now I think that's complete enough.
